{"id":14526,"date":"2013-07-11T00:01:27","date_gmt":"2013-07-11T07:01:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/barbarafalconernewhall.com\/?p=14526"},"modified":"2013-07-11T00:01:27","modified_gmt":"2013-07-11T07:01:27","slug":"when-the-bride-doesnt-wear-white-and-neither-does-anyone-else","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/when-the-bride-doesnt-wear-white-and-neither-does-anyone-else\/","title":{"rendered":"When the Bride Doesn’t Wear White — And Neither Does Anyone Else"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Women<\/a>
A June wedding in the San Francisco Bay Area. Photos by BF Newhall<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

By Barbara Falconer Newhall<\/em><\/p>\n

The bride wore red. And violet. And cerise. And gold.<\/p>\n

It was an Indian wedding with all the trimmings — drums, gongs, garlands, priestly \"Orangeblessings, a turban for the groom and, for the bride, an actual palanquin<\/a> with four bearers to transport her to her wedding.<\/p>\n

Add to the ritual, flocks of female guests in their newest, most resplendent, most drop-dead beautiful saris. There was silk everywhere at this wedding. Chiffon. Embroidered hems. Sashes threaded with silver. Gold hanging from ears, necks, wrists and fingers. Smooth-fitting cholis baring sumptuous arms, midriffs and backs.\u00a0 And down those backs, black braids longer than my arms and nearly as thick.<\/p>\n

To my mind, there’s nothing quite like an Indian wedding to remind the Western woman — with her slick leather jackets, ripped and bleached jeans, and oh-so-understated little black cocktail dresses — that she has forgotten how to be gorgeous.<\/p>\n

For my son’s groom’s dinner in May, for example, I needed to wear something festive. I picked out a dress that for me was on the flashy side. It had a whiff of color — dark blue instead \"An<\/a>of black. And it had beads. Shiny ones. And ruffles, for heaven’s sake.<\/p>\n

But then, a few weeks later, I found myself faced with an even more daunting sartorial challenge — what to wear<\/a> to a no-holds-barred South Indian wedding where I’d be up against women in their very best, most outrageously gorgeous saris?<\/p>\n

I dug through my closet and came across the kimono that my mother-in-law brought me from Japan twenty-some years ago.\u00a0 It was brocade and screechingly red with a humongous tie in the front. I’ve owned it for decades, but never worn it, because where do you wear a fire engine red kimono?<\/p>\n

To an Indian wedding reception, of course.<\/p>\n

My in-your-face kimono notwithstanding I found I couldn’t begin to compete with the saris at that wedding; I was still the dun-feathered wren in a flock of flamingos.<\/p>\n

All evening I kept asking myself, why be \"Fuchsia<\/a>beautiful? Why bother? Why go crazy with color and beading and embroidery and six-yard swaths of\u00a0 fabric?<\/p>\n

For the heck of it, of course. For the pure fun of being knock-out, over-the-top gorgeous once in a while.<\/p>\n

For a story about what to wear to your son’s wedding, check out “Is That Me in the Mirror — Or Somebody’s Grandmother?<\/a><\/em> <\/em><\/p>\n

To read more about Peter’s groom’s dinner — and the restaurants of Minneapolis — go to “A Groom’s Dinner at a Place Called The Bachelor Farmer.”<\/a>\u00a0 <\/em><\/p>\n

You can learn a little more about my mother-in-law at “Peter’s Fast-Track Grandmother.”<\/a>\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Mean<\/a>
The men at the wedding stuck to dark suits.\u00a0 Photos by BF Newhall<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"Boldly<\/a>
But the women went for no-holds-barred color and pattern.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"The<\/a>
The bride wore a red sari for her morning wedding, violet and cerise for the reception.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"Green<\/a>
Some fair-skinned women opted for . . .<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"A<\/a>
. . . muted green and dainty pink.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"Jon<\/a>
Jon and I in our wedding finery, I in a kimono from Japan, Jon in his best navy suit. BF Newhall photo<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"A<\/a>
A reader asked to see the full kimono. Any suggestions as to how I can make it look less bulky? Fit better? More flattering? BF Newhall photo<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\"Part<\/a><\/p>\n

It’s an Indian wedding with all the trimmings — drums, gongs, garlands of flowers, priestly blessings and flocks of women wearing gorgeous saris. I’m a Westerner. What do I wear? Read more.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":14642,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[565,34,1021,566,1022,835,1023,56,31,1024,814,985,1025],"class_list":["post-14526","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-a-case-of-the-human-condition","tag-body-image","tag-dont-miss","tag-dresses","tag-fashion","tag-kimonos","tag-mother-of-the-groom","tag-on-the-finny-side","tag-peter","tag-photo-ops","tag-saris","tag-shopping-stories","tag-wedding","tag-women"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14526","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=14526"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14526\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=14526"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=14526"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/server.stagingweb3.net\/barbarafalconernewhall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=14526"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}