My Brand-New White Hair. It’s Real. It’s Scary. But I Kinda Like It

I'm coming out of the closet with the white hair I've been hiding all these years. Photo by Barbara Newhall
I’m coming out of the closet with the white hair I’ve hidden away for years. I like it, but I scare myself every time I look in the mirror. Selfie by Barbara Newhall

One of the things that happens when you’ve got mono is — you don’t have the zip to do  much of anything. You don’t feel like writing a blog post. You don’t feel like spending a day at the mall or an hour at Zumba. And you certainly don’t give a darn that your roots are starting to show.

I’ve let a lot of things go during my six-month (so far) siege with the Epstein-Barr virus, including this blog and including the person looking back at me from the mirror.

Baggy Pants, Neglected Website

I’ve written only a couple of blog posts. And every morning I’ve donned the same old, same old baggy velour outfits.

Spend three-plus hours at the hairdresser to rid myself of those tell-tale, age-revealing white roots? No way.

But a few weeks ago, feeling quite a bit better, I paused long enough in front of the bathroom mirror to notice that my roots were seriously grown out. An inch or two of new hair was showing, and it was white, white, white.

White hair? Me? What a thought. I’d been a brunette all my life. And I’d been

Barbara Falconer Newhall when she was Barbara Falconer in 1965, on a beach in a bathing suit, her now white hair was brunette. Barbara Newhall photo
On a Long Island beach, 1965. I’d always been a brunette, until I wasn’t. Barbara Newhall photo

attacking those tell-tale gray and white hairs since my forties. I was a journalist, and if I wanted to survive in the competitive business of writing for publication, I had to think — and look — young and trendy.

Journalism is a young person’s sport. Advertisers want to reach the young demographic. And the newspapers and magazines that employed me for decades were targeting the 18- to 35-year-old refrigerator-buying, restaurant-dining, Nike-sporting market. I felt I had to keep a youthful image, so I made sure that those gray hairs didn’t show.

White Hair for Boomers and Me?

But now, the nether years were upon me. Those baby boomers who had been my personal target demographic for so many years were following me into their 70s and oldish age. Their roots were probably as white as mine.

Was it time for me — and my readers — to go natural?

I decided to give it a try. Mono-weary as I was, I wasn’t getting out of the house much at the time. If I let the white hair grow out and it made me look old and rickety, only Jon would notice, and he wasn’t noticing. He was busy writing his thriller.

Mid-March I reported to Gino over at Entourage. He cut most of the dyed and

Barbara Falconer Newhall in her new white hair tries it out with a dark red shirt. Photo by Barbara Newhall
I thought my new white hair would mean I had to start wearing . . .
Barbara Falconer Newhall tries out her new hair color a turquoise shirt. Photo by Barbara Newhall
. . . pastels only. But  it looked just fine with dark red . . .
Author Barbara Falconer Newhall tries out her new hair color with a navy outfit. Photo by Barbara Newhall
. . . teal and navy. Selfies by Barbara Newhall

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

highlighted hair away. But only most of it. It looked terrible, white in the front, salt and pepper in the back, and orange on top  where the last vestiges of my color-treated hair lived on.

A few weeks later, I went back to Gino and insisted that he cut it all off. All of it. Every last lock of artificially colored hair.

Gino didn’t want to do it. He said my hair would be way too short.

But I was OK with that. If I looked like I’d just been through chemotherapy, so much the better. That would put me in solidarity with my favorite neighbor, who’d had chemo last summer and was just starting to get her (gray) hair back.

Gino chopped away, then smoothed product onto what was left of my hair. He pulled and twisted the strands until I had a sassy sticky-uppy haircut.

I was now a 76-year-old with white hair and an in-your-face do, a strange person who still scares me, weeks later, whenever I catch a glimpse of her in the mirror.

How do I look? Pretty, maybe. Youthful, maybe. On-trend, definitely.

More about that getting older thing at “The Shame of Aging. The Big Seven-Five Has Finally Arrived.” and “Gray Hairs, Wrinkles, and Kids Who Won’t Stop Growing Up.”

Author Barbara Falconer Newhall tries out her new hair with a navy outfit. Photo by Barbara Newhall
I like the white. But the salt and pepper look in back — not so much. Photo by Barbara Newhall
Comments

0 Responses

  1. You always look great! whether in 1965 as a brunette of in 2018 with slightly whiter hair.
    Hope you continue your riffs.

  2. You can improve ‘The Look’ significantly in just a couple of easy steps…
    1. Set two table lamps on your desk
    2. Turn the lamps on
    3. Take the light bulbs out
    4. Wet your index fingers
    5. Stick wet index fingers into empty live bulb sockets for 1/1000ths second
    You’ll have a wonderful new look, and BONUS!, never have to comb again
    🙂
    [remember? Jon warned you]

    1. This reminds me of a visit to — I think it was the nuclear facility at Oak Ridge, TN — back in the 1950s when I was about ten. The guide told me to put my hand on this big round thing — I did, and all my hair stood on end. I lived to tell the story, as you can see. But I’m not sure I’d survive your beauty suggestion, so I’ll just stick with that goopy, sticky-uppy product my hairdresser sold me.

  3. Barbara, I am one of your baby boomer followers, and while I don’t have the courage to “go white” as you did, I am inspired — and send you big cheers. As a redhead, I am not sure I am ready to give up my “identity” at this point. But the day will come … Thank you.

    1. My grandmother had red hair as a young woman. But it was a beautiful white by the time I first saw her. Soooo, my impression has always been that redheads get to have beautiful white hair. Still, I get it. I think of myself as a brunette, so it’s a bit of a shock every time I look in the mirror. Having that distinctive red hair has to be tougher to let go of, I imagine.

  4. You look FABULOUS, chic and sophisticated! I think about it every time
    I look in the mirror, so now you are an inspiration. Maybe soon for me too. I’ll
    skip the mono part to make me do it. Are you better? I hope so!.

    1. Go for it, Melissa. One big plus to doing without the hair coloring is I now feel I can let my hair grow long without worrying about a part forming and revealing those tell-tale roots.
      Mono not so bad. But I still have to limit what I do. That’s enlightening as I am kind of reprioritizing things. B

  5. I like it! The look is lovely and elegant. I”m planning to go au naturel once our youngest is out of high school (three more years). Can’t wait!

    1. Kathryn, Why wait? Doing away with those coloring sessions at the hairdresser has saved me a lot of time and money. And my hair is healthier without the chemicals. Still, I waited and waited to take the leap. When I saw that the new hair coming in was really white (in front, anyway), I decided to go for it. I don’t think I would have liked the salt and pepper look. That’s just my taste. Good luck!

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